Lube It Up And Lube It Down, Lube It All Around

Learn about the ins and outs of anal sex. What makes for a great anal sex session, and is it actually a possibility.

Case #: 1646

Concern：

My boyfriend and I really want to do something new in bed, we want to spice it up a little. We have determined that we are going to have anal sex, but there is one problem. Neither of us has ever had anal sex. We are both virgins to having anal sex. What are some steps I can take so that when I do have sex with him it won't hurt for both of us?

Discussion：

Anal sex can be great when, and only when, you take the proper precautions beforehand. Unfortunately, sex through the backdoor is not as user-friendly as regular sex, there are some extra steps you'll have to take in order to achieve a pain-free intercourse session.

Doing Anal

Firstly, it is important to understand that the vagina is self lubricating and the anus is not. You will need plenty of lube on hand to keep things extra slick and slippery...But we're getting a bit ahead of ourselves.

Before any type of sex has been had, you should both try sharing a hot bath or shower. This will help to relax your muscles a bit and calm the mind. During this bathing ritual, you should pay close attention to cleaning the genitals. You may also try enjoying a soothing massage given by your partner. It is imperative that you are both calm and relaxed throughout the entire session.

Trust In Me

Once you've reached a state of both relaxation and arousal, you should then move to the lube. (SEE: Your Guide To Anal Lubricants) I would definitely recommend a lubricant that is water based, and one that does not include a fragrance or flavor. Oil-based lubes can leave behind a sticky residue, and will require a lot of stopping and reapplying during sex. Some oils can actually irritate the delicate anal tissue, they can also create a pretty detrimental environment for vaginal tissue as well. And when combined with latex condoms, oil-based lubricants have the power to actually destroy latex material.

Having your partner use a condom would also be very wise when engaging in anal sex. Just like regular sex, a condom will protect both parties from contracting and harmful bacteria or sexually transmitted diseases.

Take Charge

During anal sex, it is important for the woman to set the pace and intensity of the intercourse session. If at any time you begin to feel any discomfort or pain, stop. Take a breather for a few minutes and keep yourself and your partner well lubricated at all times. Try repositioning from the traditional doggy-style to man-on-top missionary. Believe it or not, the missionary position with a pillow propped under the small of a woman's back can actually help tremendously.

The easiest way to describe anal would be sex…Just happening in a completely different part of the body. When done right, you should both come out very pleased.