A Saga of Too Much Self-Pleasure: Now She Can’t Orgasm With Her Boyfriend

She’s engaged in self-pleasure for 17 years, first with a shower jet and then with a vibrator. Now she can’t orgasm during intercourse, and to make matters worse, her clitoris and vagina are numb. Her problems are caused by masturbation – when engaged excessively, it can cause unhealthy physical and mental responses to sex.

Case #: 1421

Concern：

I am 29 years old and have been using a shower jet to masturbate since the age of 12. I have also used a vibrator in the bed since five years ago. I have not been able to orgasm with my boyfriend, and I think this might be the cause of it. What happened to me? I have noticed my clit and vagina are numb and insensitive.

Discussion：

You’re right in thinking masturbation is the culprit behind your orgasm difficulty. This isn’t because masturbation is wrong, but because you’ve lacked proper knowledge about your body. Once a person finds something that feels good, he or she continues doing it without giving thought to health implications. The truth is that excessive masturbation can impair your mental and physical well-being.

Perils of Pleasure

Loaded with nerve endings, the clitoris was designed for pleasure. Its stimulation can send a woman into paroxysms of bliss that relieve tension and fight pain. But too much stimulation is harmful, especially with regard to masturbation. Although the clitoris is a sexual organ, its heightened sensitivity means it can be easily damaged. Repeatedly stimulating it with a vibrator desensitizes nerves and causes the numbness of which you speak.

Using sex toys is different from manual stimulation or oral sex because the former pulsate at high rates of speed. They are intended for direct contact with the genitals, meaning they feel good but can seriously damage tissues. Once clitoral nerves begin to lose sensation, you must use greater pressure and increased speeds to continue reaching climax. In time, the nerves don’t respond as they should, and orgasm becomes impossible.

Once your nerves are damaged, no amount of touching will bring you to orgasm. It’s important to understand damage to clitoral nerves can also cause vaginal insensitivity. Although these organs are separate from each other, their nerves run in close proximity to each other throughout the pelvis. The inability to have a clitoral orgasm can therefore impede vaginal orgasms as well.

Mental Implications of Over-Masturbation

Self-pleasure is an easy and no-holds barred activity. You don’t have to worry about impressing or satisfying a lover and you can quickly or slowly bring yourself to orgasm. The control rests with you, not somebody else, and you’re free to experiment any way you like.

Intercourse, on the other hand, is more complex and requires you to think about your partner. The intimacy of sex makes some women feel vulnerable – they worry about their bodies, their techniques and their partners’ thoughts. Desire for intercourse can thus be dampened when a woman knows she can touch herself and enjoy guaranteed pleasure.

Keep in mind that sexual desire starts in the brain, not the genitals. Sex involves four distinct stages: arousal, plateau (lovemaking), orgasm, and resolution. If one of these stages is missing, the experience will be less than satisfactory. Many women accustomed to masturbation don’t want intercourse, which in and of itself makes it difficult to orgasm.

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

This information sounds incredibly dismal, but here’s some good news: the damage to your clitoris is only temporary. You must stop masturbating to allow your body time to heal, and with that your orgasms will return as normal. It’s also crucial for you to learn the pleasures of intercourse. Be sure you and your boyfriend kiss, cuddle and engage in foreplay before sex. Also share with him your desires so he knows exactly what you want when you make love.

You can enhance your clitoral and vaginal sensitivity with an herbal restorative formula. (TRY: Herbal Formula for Clitoral Restoration & Sensitivity Enhancer) Greater sensitivity will improve the way sex feels and keep you more aroused. Ingredients like Horny Goat Weed and Dong Quai are especially beneficial because they rejuvenate damaged nerve endings – meaning your boyfriend’s touch will bring the same pleasure as masturbation once did – and improve blood flow to the clitoris. In sum, sex will feel better than ever.