He’s Smaller, She’s Looser: Overcoming Anatomical Differences in the Bedroom

This couple is comparing each other to past lovers; her ex had a bigger penis, while his had a tighter vagina. Intercourse between them isn’t perfect, and he wants her to exercise her vaginal muscles to tighten them. Similarly, she’s afraid that birthing two children has permanently stretched her vagina. But all hope is not lost.

Case #: 795

Concern：

I have a problem that I didn’t have before. I’m having sex with my new boyfriend, and he has a smaller sex organ than my previous sex partner of many years. The problem is that he says he wants me to exercise my vagina muscles so that sex could be better. In reality, I guess he means that I’m not tight enough. My questions are: does it have to do with his smaller sex organ? Does my having two kids also have anything to do with it, and what can I do to help the problem?

Discussion：

Your boyfriend has asked you to “exercise” your vaginal muscles because the friction normally created during sex isn’t as strong between the two of you. This is probably the result of two factors: the size of his penis and your slightly weakened vaginal muscles. Your condition is the result of childbirth, which is one of only two factors that cause a woman’s vagina to age. In this instance, age isn’t a reference to years but rather to condition. Your vaginal muscles have lost some elasticity because of the rigors of childbirth.

However, sex can still be immensely enjoyable. You must remember that some women have upwards of three or four children, meaning that changes to your body don’t have to diminish sexual pleasure. It is not your sole responsibility to ensure time in the bedroom brings satisfaction; you and your boyfriend together should explore ways to improve sex, especially if neither of you is satisfied. In the meantime, you can familiarize with the complex nature of the vagina and learn how to tighten your muscles for more friction and stronger orgasms.

Debunking the Myths

One of the most popular myths about the vagina is that it will become loose after engaging in lots of sex. But intercourse is exercise and actually improves muscle tone in the vagina. While it may seem that a penis could cause permanent damage, vaginal muscles are designed to expand and contract with penetration. Frequent intercourse will not make a woman loose, just as refraining from sex will not make her tight.

It’s also important to know the vagina naturally stretches during arousal to ease the process of penetration. Like lubrication, this is a biological process that improves sexual stimulation. If your muscles were constricted, intercourse would bring you nothing but pain and discomfort.

Finally, not all vaginas are made the same. Just as your previous lover’s penis was larger, your boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend might have had a tighter vagina. This is not a reflection of anything you have done but is merely a result of natural anatomical differences.

What is an Aging Vagina?

Having children can impact the vagina and cause it to become looser. The degree of impact depends on your age and how strenuous your deliveries were. Birthing a large baby or enduring labor for many hours will stretch your vagina more than a small baby or a short labor.

Simply put, an aging vagina is one that has withstood life changes. In a woman’s younger years, her vagina is likely to be lush and tight with strong, thick walls. Childbirth stretches the vaginal walls, and multiple children can cause those muscles to lose their elasticity and become loose. Age has a similar effect, and a woman in her late 40s or early 50s experiencing a decline in estrogen will notice her vagina is not as tight as it once was. Hence, the term aging vagina.

Build Strength and Enjoy Sex

Aside from sharing with your boyfriend ideas to improve intercourse, you can increase your vaginal tightness with a regeneration and detoxification formula. (SEE: Herbal Formula For Vaginal Regeneration) Blood flow is crucial to stimulating healthy vaginal tissue, and a blend of regenerative herbs can improve this flow and increase muscle elasticity. Similarly, herbs with detoxification properties can expel toxins from your body and optimize hormones levels. In turn, your vaginal muscles will be strong and tight so you and your boyfriend both revel in the pleasures of sex.