Two Out Of Three Aren't Enough

Here's the story of a guy who has almost all the requirements for an excellent lover, but that one missing quality almost turns the rest to nothing: he can't keep it up anywhere near long enough to satisfy her. He's humble enough to try various other things promising to improve his stamina, to no avail. If you find yourself in a similar situation, read on to get the facts and see what you can do to help.

Case #: 1162

Concern：

I have the size. I have the technique. I just lack the endurance. According to my wife, my sexual endurance is fine. But come on, I know she is lying. My endurance stymies her ability to orgasm each time during sex. And as a dedicated husband, I’ve tried all sorts of remedies to improve my endurance. I’ve tried rings. I’ve tried mental images to allay the stimulation. I’ve even tried creams to numb my penis. The rings hurt. I mental images weaken my erection. And the creams, well, the creams make her numb to stimulation. What should I do to improve my endurance?

Discussion：

We've all seen the video: Philadelphia's favorite underdog son in a grey sweatsuit, jogging through the streets and alleys of the city, lifting weights and sparring in the boxing ring, with that unforgettable 1970s jazz-trumpet theme playing in the background... “Trying hard now, getting strong now...” You'd be hard-pressed to find any man struggling to improve their physical fitness level who hasn't had that sequence running through his head.

The only problem is that it simply doesn't apply when you're trying to build up your sexual stamina.

Your Penis Is Not Like The Rest Of You

Your erection is supported by hydraulic pressure inside your corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum: little valves at one end close but the other end stays open, the blood keeps pumping into your penis and expands the tissues of the corpus cavernosum as much as possible, then the valves at the other end close. It's something like attaching a very stretchy rubber tube to a faucet. With both ends open, water flows freely. If you grab the end opposite the faucet with the water running, the hose expands and becomes stiff; fortunately, your penis has safety valves that keep too much blood from flooding your penis. Note that there are no bones or muscles involved in the process at any point, which should tell you that the exercise techniques you use for most of the rest of your body won't work here.

Analyzing The System

Based on your letter, it's a safe bet that you are not a novice when it comes to sex, so ignorance-induced performance anxiety can probably be dismissed as contributing to your premature ejaculation. It's also a reasonable assumption that you haven't had any long “dry spells”, which can heighten your sensitivity. That still leaves several other possibilities. We'd like to encourage you to speak with your health-care provider and get a more professional opinion, but here are a few places to start.

What Can I Do?

First, your diet. Remember that erections can be affected by changes in your bloodstream, including certain chemical additives found in foods and beverages. Caffeine will reduce your endurance, so try to reduce your overall intake at least a three hours or so before you and your partner adjourn to the bedroom.

Next, your general stress level. Sex is great for relieving stress, true. But sex can only relieve so much at once; if you're too stressed out, your body can't re-allocate the necessary resources to maintain an erection and hold off ejaculation for too long.

Third, your mind. You've already explored mental images to slow down your erection, but the ones you focus on tend to reduce or eliminate your erection. Right now, you're probably worried about not going the distance, which makes you nervous, which increases your chances of not going the distance, which makes you more nervous... and so on. So embrace a paradox: if you accept that you may not get the prize this time, your stress level decreases... which can help you sustain your erection longer.

While discussing your options and monitoring your progress with your health-care provider, you may consider using an herbal supplement designed to ease your nervousness and improving your stamina while providing nutrients essential for sexual health. (SEE: Ejaculatiory Nerve Relief for Premature Ejaculation)