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Free Your Mind – A Remedy for Orgasm Dysfunction Caused by Vibrator Use

She does not enjoy sex with her husband because she cannot reach climax. The problem is that she’s masturbated for years with a vibrator, which has damaged her nerves. Now she must find a way to calm and stimulate her mind so she can freely engage in intercourse.

Case #: 596

Concern:

I have a problem with my vagina. I don’t know what it could be, but sex is not enjoyable. This is primarily because I have never been able to orgasm. I want to know what that feels like. I have used water in the bath to masturbate for many years as well as a vibrator on my clit. I am not sure if that has anything to do with things, but I have never been able to orgasm with my husband either…

Any advice is much appreciated.

Discussion:

You have not been able to reach orgasm during intercourse because you suffer from vibrator damage. The very thought that a sex toy can harm a body part seems counterintuitive – after all, it is supposed to bring pleasure.

But when used extensively, erotica can overstimulate nerve endings in the clitoris and vagina. This causes orgasm dysfunction and a less than pleasurable sexual experience.

Intercourse and the Female Orgasm

Many women find it difficult to orgasm during intercourse because the vagina, despite looming misconceptions, is not a sex organ. Sigmund Freud perpetuated the notion that vaginal orgasms are possible, when in fact they are not. What is possible is stimulation of the clitoris and/or G-spot. Without either, a woman will not reach climax.

Intercourse usually cannot bring women to orgasm, but they still long for sexual pleasure. Into this foray comes, vibrators, dildos and other sex toys, which touch women in all the right places with ease and pleasure. Doctors even occasionally recommend erotica so women can overcome the boundaries posed by intercourse and enjoy sexual gratification on their own terms.

Explaining Vibrator Damage

The idea that vibrators permanently damage a woman’s body isn’t true because they don’t. Instead, frequent use causes numbness and temporary damage to the nerves. Within seconds, a sex toy can bring a woman to the edge of blissful oblivion, and she is likely to be amazed by the powerful waves that course through her body with orgasm.

But she is likely to require greater stimulation with each use, meaning the vibrator’s speed or pressure must be revved up to meet her needs. This is because the clitoris’s nerves, all 8,000 of them, are directly stimulated with a vibrator. The clit simply isn’t made for such aggression, and its nerves suffer with time.

Unlike you, a woman who has never climaxed with the aid a vibrator is likely to derive great pleasure from a finger or tongue stroke. But such light touches don’t equal the power of a sex toy. Herein is your situation: your nerves are temporarily overstimulated, and you need deeper stimulation in the bedroom to reach climax. This is not to say that your husband needs to be more aggressive, but that you must take a break from masturbation. Your nerves need to heal, and they can only do that with the passage of time.

The Right Techniques for Orgasm

Reaching orgasm requires the right frame of mind. If you are more intent on climax than the pleasures afforded by intercourse, you are probably putting too much pressure on yourself. You must relax, and if it requires the help of your husband to do this, you should openly discuss your needs with him. The two of you can together find ways to make you feel more comfortable.

While you calm your mind, you should also focus on breathing and meditation. Harmony Qi Gong is an ancient healing method shown to reduce stress and improve the mind and body connection. This simple technique, which forces you to slowly and carefully inhale and exhale, also rejuvenates a woman’s sexual responses so she can reach orgasm more readily. By employing the power of your mind, you will learn to see sex differently, and you will reach climax by reveling in pleasure rather than waiting for stimulation.

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