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Rendezvous With Anus: The Secret to Pain-Free Anal sex
There seems to be this strange aura of forbidden taboo that surrounds sex of the anal variety. I remember the first time I admitted to one of my friends that I had tried anal sex. She actually seemed pretty put out about the whole situation. I never went into specifics, but I did admit that I enjoyed it... She became even more perplexed.
The First Time
I believe that my dear friend reacted with such disdain because she just could not connect the act of anal sex with pleasure. Most likely, all she could relate it to was an incredible amount of pain that canceled out any sort of enjoyment possible. But honestly, I could care less about her less-than-thrilled reaction to one of the most surprisingly pleasurable sexual experiences I had ever experienced.
I suppose I was lucky, my “first time” took place partially in a shower. I was well relaxed, well lubed, and I completely trusted my partner at the time. He took his time throughout the entire session, never rushing through, and always stopping if I even felt the slightest twinge. Trust and respect are so important when it comes to any type of intercourse, whether you enter through the back door or the front entrance. That trust that your partner will not burst through either door with guns a blazing is the real basis for a relaxed experience. It's what will help those tight anal muscles loosen up.
The Second Time
Honestly, I've only engaged in anal all of two times. The first went by swimmingly. I never felt any blinding pain, and I actually found it to be highly enjoyable. I remember trying to describe to my friend exactly how it felt. The best I could come up with was, “It's like sex, but in a different place.” And that's exactly how it felt…the first time.
My second foray with anal did not go so well. I was still with the same partner, but a lot of time had passed and we were no longer on the same page. About a month after our 'first time' he cheated on me. I was very young and naive at the time, so of course I ended up taking him back, big mistake! From then on out my trust for him ran on 'E' constantly. Because I didn't trust him, I just could not relax, whether we were having sex or not.
One night we tried anal again, sort of as a last ditch effort to save our sex life. It had gone pretty stale after the cheating scandal. It was absolutely horrible. Even though I was properly lubed, and he still did not rush through the motions, I simply could not relax. Less than half way through I insisted he stop. I had started to experience a sharp, stabbing pain within my lower abdomen that had become unbearable. The pressure from the penetration didn't help either.
Trust In Me
The moral of my little story here is that mutual respect and trust are above all the most important ingredients when it comes to sexual experimentation. Yes, the proper lube products and contraception are important as well, but without a sturdy foundation to grind on you will not be able to stave off the tensing of the anus muscles and pain will occur.
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