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Blurry Vengeance – Masturbation and Vision Problems

You've heard it said: Touch yourself too much, and you'll go blind. But could it actually be true? Well, no, not exactly, but there is a glimmer of truth to this legend. Learn the facts.

Case #: 679

Concern:

I'm starting to have weird vision problems, like blurriness and squiggly lines. The eye doctor says my vision is fine. I read on your site that masturbation can be the problem. I do masturbate a lot, probably 3 times a day, sometimes less. Can this really be the problem? It seems kind of strange.

Discussion:

When you're 11 or 12 years old, masturbation is a terrifying and wonderful thing. On the one hand, it feels unlike anything you've ever experienced, and you just can't even put it into words. But on the other hand, you're wondering just what kinds of horrors it can unleash.

After all, you start to hear certain ominous murmurings from your peers: “I hear it causes hairy palms;” “I hear that if you run out of sperm, you die.” And who can forget this old gem from the Masturbation Greatest Hits Collection?: “If you touch yourself too much, you'll go blind!”

What? Blind? Okay, so that's a bit of an exaggeration, most likely cooked up by some sanctimonious nun at an Irish Catholic boarding school, but like many rumors and urban legends, it does contain within it a slight glimmer of truth, as you have already realized firsthand. Specifically, masturbation can cause blurred vision and eye floaters. So the next obvious questions is, “How the hell does that happen?” After all, you don't masturbate by poking yourself in the eyes (the activity would probably be a lot less popular if that were the case).

Masturbation – More Than Meets the Eye

Blurred vision is not a side effect of masturbation per se, but of sexual exhaustion, and if we put two and two together, it's not hard to discern that too much masturbation is the #1 cause of sexual exhaustion.

Because let's be honest, how many of us are actually getting laid every single day? You see, the different functions in the body—from sexual pleasure, to vision, to pain management, to problem-solving abilities—are all inner-connected by the same neurochemicals: Specifically, the neurochemicals cGMP, nitric oxide and acetylcholine are responsible for healthy eye function AND healthy sexual function, so if you're depleting those chemicals through round-the-clock masturbation, your vision is going to suffer as a result.

I Was Blind but Now I See

If you want to get rid of those annoying floaters and replace that annoying blurriness with the high-res vision that you were meant to have, start by nixing the masturbation and sex for a few weeks.

Let your penis take a sabbatical, and get your neurochemicals back in regular working order. Additionally, I would encourage you to take an herbal treatment for blurred vision, which consists of herbs like Gingko, Fo Ti, Ginseng and Black Currant (SEE: herbal treatment for blurred vision)

These and similar herbs will help to replenish the necessary neurochemicals and get your vision back in order. Just promise me one thing: Once your sight is back to its 20/20 glory, don't go wasting it on hardcore porn, or we might find ourselves right back at square 1!

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