The Benefits of Routine: Planning for Sex is the Best Way to Increase Pleasure
Few people realize it, but good sex requires forethought. Media portrayals of perfect intercourse magically happening don’t tell the bigger story –you need to plan for your health and tend to your mental and physical needs. This doesn’t mean lovemaking should be routine. We’re striving for the opposite – passionate lovemaking that protects you from pregnancy, disease and infection.
Collect Your Thoughts and Must-Have Items
Before you and your lover get anywhere near the bedroom, you need to consider what will happen pre- and post-sex. You know, those moments when you’re stripping each other’s clothes off and then basking in the afterglow of love.
Let’s start with a checklist of items needed for sex. Foremost is birth control, be it a condom, diaphragm or oral contraceptive. Depending on the method you use, the point is to have this handy – on a bedside table or dresser - or to have taken it before you and your man are entwined. This will save you from interrupting a moment of fervor.
Other items to have available include tissues for post-sex wiping, erotic toys and lubricant. The importance of this last item cannot be overstated. Lubrication protects against skin tears and enhances clitoral and vaginal stimulation for more powerful orgasms. It may also lower your risk for developing urinary tract infections.
For a final touch, fluff the pillows and straighten the duvet on your bed. If this sounds a little cheesy, you should remember sex is a feast for all the senses. Clean, soft bedding arranged with care will feel better to bare skin than dirty sheets and mussed blankets.
Get Your Body and Mind in the Mood
With the stage set, we’re on to two more items that can take sex from great to stunning: exercise and foreplay. Because we’re talking about pre- and post-sex rituals here, you’ll want to find a way to include both with all of your planning.
We don’t need to tell you exercise is good for the body. For the purpose of sex, it builds muscle tone essential for healthy sexual responses. Multiple muscles in the body contract and relax with each orgasm. Strengthening those muscles will only make the big “o” stronger and more fulfilling.
On those days when you will likely have intercourse, a quick workout before boosts hormones. In less than 30 minutes, a host of feel-good chemicals rise. You’ll feel the effects when you look at your partner and want to throw him on the bed – estrogen and testosterone increase with exercise, and both drive sexual desire.
As much as you might want to rush into sex, don’t. Foreplay is like the introduction to a touching movie. It builds anticipation and gets your blood pumping. It’s also a great time for him to stimulate your clit, which will almost inevitably lead to orgasm – or make you fraught with sexual tension.
When All is Said and Done
After you’re both satisfied, you want to use the restroom as tactfully as possible. This might slightly detract from romance, but it’s essential to vaginal health. Urinating cleanses your body of toxins and bacteria that cause infection.
With the essentials neatly finished, you’re free to cuddle, talk and even enjoy a snack together. Cuddling ignites a post-sex connection that’s as important as pre-sex planning. But you don’t have to hug in a tired fashion. Use this time to feed each other chocolate-covered strawberries, popcorn or any other snack that suits your appetites. Finish with a cold glass of beer, champagne or carbonated water to relax together and prepare for refreshing sleep.
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