Bring Back That Lovin’ Feelin’ – When Birth Control Pills Cause Orgasm Dysfunction

This couple has spent nine months in a sexual relationship, seven of which have been fulfilling for him but not for her. The culprit is birth control pills, which she started taking two months after their first time making love. Before the pills, she climaxed as easily as he did, but even after stopping her oral contraceptive, she is less than enthralled with sex.

Case #: 530

Concern：

I’ve read some of the case studies on your website, but I cannot find my specific problem on here. A year ago, I started a relationship with my girlfriend, and we are getting married in less than one month. Nine months ago, we started to have sex, which yielded multiple orgasms on both of our parts.

Seven months ago, she started taking the pill, and after some days, she was unable to have an orgasm. We assumed the pill was preventing her from having an orgasm, so she suspended it with no change to her sexual satisfaction. We have spent the last seven months making love, and the only one who moans and fully enjoys sex is me.

Can you please tell me what I can do to have her experience an orgasm again?

Discussion：

The inability to achieve an orgasm can frustrate and dishearten both partners – as has happened in your situation. This condition is caused by many different culprits, including emotional trauma, inadequate sexual techniques and overstimulation of the clitoris or vagina. Certain medications such as the pill can also lead to orgasm dysfunction, but a woman often does not realize this until the damage is already done.

Birth Control Pills and Sex

Orgasm dysfunction affects one-third of all women between the ages of 18 and 49. While men may also experience such problems, women are far more likely to be affected because of biological and physiological differences in their bodies. At this point, it is important to understand what an orgasm is - a reflex of the body that requires healthy sensory nerves in the genital region (for women, this is the clitoris and vagina). In turn, those organs rely on the body’s balanced production of estrogen and testosterone.

But birth control pills interfere with the natural levels of hormones in order to prevent pregnancy. Interruption of these hormones is necessary for the contraceptive to work, but it can also diminish sensation in the clitoris and vagina, which cause climax issues. This disorder is called orgasm dysfunction, defined as the inability to climax after proper arousal and stimulation.

Once orgasm dysfunction sets in, she is less likely to want sex because physiologically she no longer associates sex to pleasure.

Defining Good Sex

Society robotically links sex with an orgasm, believing the former should absolutely lead to the latter. This would be true in a perfect world where everybody – including women - easily achieved climax. But that perfect world doesn’t exist, even as sex remains a crucial component of romantic relationships.

Good sex is that which focuses on more than both partners “getting off.” This experience should bring equal parts emotional and physical satisfaction. Because your girlfriend was able to achieve an orgasm before starting birth control but now cannot suggests she feels uncomfortable in the bedroom. The best way to overcome this and improve upon your sex lives is by talking. Ask what she likes in the bedroom, and use this information to create a stimulating experience for her. Remember it doesn’t have to be a sprint to the finish – you both should feel comfortable and aroused while you make love.

Undoing Birth Control Pill Damage

Another crucial point is this: even after ceasing an oral contraceptive, the pill’s toxins can remain in a woman’s body for quite some time. Taking an herbal formula with ingredients like Milk Thistle and Catuaba will detoxify the liver and help the body expel unwanted substances. Herbal remedies have also shown to increase blood flow to both the vagina and clitoris to improve nerve sensory.

Reviving the body’s sexual responses will help both of you get in the mood and channel your energies for long and satisfying sexual intercourse.