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How I Become Embarrassed Upon Arrival

Learn about the trials and tribulations we go through as women when it comes to female ejaculation.

Case #: 1627


I am apologizing ahead of time, I am sorry if this is too much information. Ever since I was younger and discovered what masturbation was and how amazing it feels I have been doing it the simple way, by applying pressure to the clitoris until point of orgasm. Masturbating this way never lead me to ejaculate until I recently bought myself a pocket vibrator. That amazing feeling just skyrocketed with the application of a vibrator and it also made me ejaculate. I have sex occasionally with a partner but I don't want to ejaculate in front of him. He says he has a toy for me to play with and wants to use it on me but I don't want to ejaculate. Is there any way I can stop this from happening?


I can't say that your inquiry does not surprise me. Most of the cases I deal with involve women who are trying to actually reach a higher state of orgasm during intercourse with their partners. However, I too came to a realization of my own sexuality at a fairly young age. As soon as I began having penetrative intercourse with another person I quickly realized that having an orgasm with someone else involved can be very difficult.

The Majority Of Women

I found this to be very puzzling. I knew how to give myself an orgasm, and I definitely knew how it felt to have one…There was no mistaking that. So why couldn't my boyfriend do it? At the time, I suppose I was just too young and naive to believe that even though I had only every masturbated in the fashion that you've mentioned above, I would somehow magically be able to reach climax through penetration alone.

What I did not have a grasp on at the time, was that only about fifteen percent of women are able to be brought to orgasm by vaginal penetration alone. The other eighty-five percent require clitoral stimulation.

Women On Top

As time went on I matured sexually, and finally in my mid twenties I got it! I found the perfect position for clitoral stimulation that gave me back my missing 'O.' The frontward facing cowgirl is my personal favorite. The best way to climax in this position is to lean forward once you have mounted your man and set the pace as you grind your clitoris against his pelvic bone.

I mention this position and a bit of my own sexual history to help illustrate my point. My point being, that unless your partner actually uses your vibrator on your clitoris, or he applies the correct amount of pressure to your clitoris during sex, there's a good chance you will not reach orgasm.

Safer Than Sorry

There is always the off chance that your partner is just that good. Luckily, there are more solid precautions you may take in order to ensure you do not ejaculate. Some advanced yoga poses, for instance, are great for strengthening the pelvic floor. It will also give you more control over your vaginal region. Doing the Aswini Mudra yoga poses specifically will help to prevent any unwanted “squirting.” The poses have been known to be even more effective then kegel exercises.

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