When He’s Not Up to Anything, not Even His Erection, And You’re Still Unsatisfied
Why is it that some men can’t keep up an erection during sex? Everything seems to be normal; foreplay goes well, he’s erect, you begin congress, and then five minutes into girl-on-top and you’re losing sensation. Quick check, what do we find? He’s half soft! Isn’t being face to face with a sexy woman, going hot and heavy, enough to keep him hard?
A little manual application and he’s back in action. Position change to hands-on-knees, things are looking up, when all of a sudden you’re left wondering if he got a text message about his grandma dying. Um, what’s going on back there?
Keep It Coming
It’s probably not every time, every position, or even the same position each time, but there are certain males who just seem unable to stay erect during extended sex. It’s like the WIFI connection in a cheap hotel—it comes and goes, and often right at the moment that you’d most like it to be coming, it’s going.
How Do You Know Which One?
The problem here is that there are so many potential reasons for a man to have issues sustaining an erection. Poor circulation is a big factor, but that could be due to any number of potential problems: unhealthy lifestyle—including drugs, alcohol, diet, and exercise—or some sort of congenital issue, such as familial high blood pressure. Even when a guy looks perfectly fine on the outside (or better than), his insides might still be nonfunctioning, as far as sex habits are concerned.
Hard Life for a Hormone
Hormonal imbalance is the other major player in erection malfunctions. This is an even trickier situation, as there are so many minute items that can alter the functions of the hormonal system in a man. In women, there is a sort of stopgap measure, wherein progesterone or estrogen can keep the female sexual mechanisms functioning at half-measures. For men, however, with their reliance on a single hormone, the smallest interruption can prove drastic.
Again, diet, exercise, and lifestyle can impede hormonal production, but even certain medications will tip the scales on testosterone production. Without testosterone, men suffer all kinds of problems with libido and erection—leaving us flapping in the wind and wondering what the heck is happening.
He’s Up, He’s Down
The worst thing about both of these situations is the fact that even beyond a physiological issue, mental struggles can create bedroom blues for a couple. Depression is an easy one to see affecting sexual performance, but the slightest hint of anxiety can be a downer for a boner. This is a common one for men who have trouble breaking to put on a condom, or to switch positions. The fear that he might not be hard enough to get back inside, or the disruption caused by the interruption can be enough to quickly deflate an otherwise strong, happy erection.
Unhappy Couple
My friend Janine and I were discussing this fact the other day. No matter the position, her boyfriend couldn’t seem to maintain a constant erection for more than five minutes in a position. “He starts out as hard as anything, but as soon as I start getting into it, I can feel him losing it,” she said. “It takes way longer for me to have an orgasm, and it makes me so frustrated I want to ask him about it.” We discussed how it’s impossible to truly know what’s at the root of the problem without a full knowledge of their physical and mental health. And those are the type of bizarre questions to drive a man away with if you’re not fully committed.
To Pry, Or Not to Pry
And while you really can’t know everything about the man you’re with without prying deep into his life, there are some ways to work around the problem without screwing up your chances of a future with him, and your good times in the bedroom. There are a number of herbs that will work to improve a man’s erection, and won’t negatively impact his body, mind, or any medications he’s currently taking. (TRY: Botanical Tincture for Weak Erections)
Give Him a Hand, Figuratively
Epimedium, Lycium, Morinda, and Cistanche are four powerful herbs that can get a man a raging erection you can count on, without always having to wonder if he’s going to leave you waiting at the last minute. It’s frustrating to always have to take the time to get him back in action, while you’re waiting for your own moment of glory.
I’d recommended Janine to try the same blend above, and when I saw her at our Christmas party, I asked if she’d noticed any difference. “I’m so relieved,” she said, “I had almost given up on having sex with him without having to do a lot of extra work. Then your herbs started kicking in, and now we can enjoy sex much longer, uninterrupted.” That’s what I like to hear! Women, this is a simple solution, to what might be a hairy problem. Don’t worry about it any longer, and don’t ruin your relationship trying to get to the bottom of it. Just give it a shot, and get back in bed.
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Ideas: Male, erectile dysfunction, male erectile dysfunction
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