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He’s seeing a psychologist but he wants to know what he can do for his physiology. Premature ejaculation and a soft erection are usually linked to physical causes.
Question:
It has been almost two years. When I want to have sex, I don't have a solid erection and I always ejaculate when I have not even penetrated a woman. This ejaculation even comes when my penis is not erect. I think I have anxiety towards sex.
I have also checked with a psychologist and have had treatment for 3 months now, but it's not working. I know simply going through counseling might be a waste of money and time. I need to know how to fix my problem physiologically instead of psychologically.
Answer:
Well, it seems that your problem may be a mix of both the physical and the mental. If you can afford it, a psychologist can help you deal with some of the mental anxiety you have towards sex.
But besides counseling, there are other ways to calm your fears about being with a woman. For most, experience is all that is needed. As you gain more sexual experience, you’ll become more comfortable with sex. It takes time to know your body and how to calm and relax it to hold back ejaculation.
Have you had any long-term sexual relationships? A steady girlfriend will often allow a man to develop his sexual maturity. The stress and worry of sleeping with someone new is not there, so you can concentrate on the sex itself.
If you do have a girlfriend now, then she can be very helpful in training your body to relax during sex. Exercises like the Masters and Johnson’s Squeeze Method or the Natural Ejaculation Control Technique either require a partner or can be more beneficial with the participation of the partner.
On the physical side, there are even more things you can do. It seems your parasympathetic nervous function is either too weak or has been damaged. The parasympathetic nerves are makes it possible to hold back ejaculation and to get a hard erection. This is why you have both the problem of a weak erection and premature ejaculation. If left untreated, impotence is surely to follow.
Don’t masturbate in excess. A frequency of about three times a week will allow your body to heal itself. If you are actively having sex, reduce or even stop masturbation entirely. When you do masturbate, do it slowly and for as long as you can before you must ejaculate.
Combined with the Natural Ejaculation Control Technique, this will train your body to last longer and better deal with the stimulation of sex.
Proper diet will help produce the needed hormones needed for your sexual functions. Besides eating right, herbal supplements are a better way to ensure you have the needed nutrients your body needs for desired sexual control.
Look for products that contain a blend of avena sativa, damiana, dong quai, gardenia, and nacre. These natural elements will help reduce some of the anxiety you feel while fortifying your body to deal with the anxiety you can’t alleviate. The increased production of neuro-chemical will nourish and run the parasympathetic nerves that control ejaculation and provide a hard erection.
Stay away from smoking and drinking and definitely stay away from recreational drugs (marijuana, ecstasy, cocaine, etc.). Keep a regular exercise habit. I’m sure you’ve heard all of this before. But besides improving your general health, it will also greatly improve your sexual health.
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