A Fractured Organ

Everybody enjoys sex. It’s an instinctive and inherent practice that has brought pleasure to man (and woman) since the human species began. Throughout the ages, we have cultivated practices to make sex more interesting. Sex toys have been developed. Techniques have been taught. But the most primal and perhaps original way of ‘spicing things up’ is the implementation of various sex positions. And there is one in particular that often mixes a bit of pain with the pleasure. Actually, a LOT of pain. In fact, it’s responsible for about 30% of all penile fractures…
 
That’s right, I’m talkin’ about the infamous ‘woman on top’ position.
 
Because the penis is an organ and contains no bone, we don't usually associate injuries with it. And, for the most part, trauma to the penis in its flaccid state is quite uncommon. However, an erect penis can easily fall victim to injury, and immediate care and treatment is necessary to restore it to health.
 

Helpful Tips

To prevent injury, it is always recommended to avoid experimenting with sexual or masturbatory activity that puts the erect penis at risk for fracture. Treat your tool with respect! Also, it’s still advisable to wear an athletic supporter to protect the genitals during physical activities such as sports or exercise. Do it!

Obviously, if the penis has become bruised, is black and blue and swollen, some major trauma has befallen it. Up to half of such instances are the results of wild intercourse. Of those, up to two-thirds are caused by a woman on top. Will they never learn? It’s not necessarily her fault – she gets caught up in the excitement and anticipation over the impending orgasm. She’s so wet she slides quickly and freely up and down her partner’s shaft. Sometimes she flies right off the flesh anchor, and hasty reinsertion is required. Other times, in careless abandon, reinsertion isn’t quite successful. Instead, the tip of the erect penis slams against the female pelvis or perineum, virtually breaking the organ in two.

Yup, this is the most common way a penis fracture can occur. Oh, the sweet and sour irony. It’s like a mid-air collision of the sex organs, and it’s the male that most often goes down in flames – or bruises. Needless to say, it’s a painful injury that adds insult with the kind of excruciating cracking you should only hear in crude comedies. Dark bruising of the penis appears almost immediately due to blood released from a rupture of the cylinder lining. Can you say, “OUCH”?
 
That’s what really gets to you – the bruising. That is, at first. Then it’s the painful erections. Or maybe it’s the unnatural curvature. And all you see is black and blue. It makes you dizzy. It’s making ME dizzy, and I’m only writing about it! Indeed, it’s a disturbing experience for any man to endure.
 
Fortunately, there are a variety of herbs that can help heal the damaged nervous endings of the fractured sex organ and reestablish the inner connection between the brain and the penis via the parasympathetic nerves. For instance, gotu kola (not like, “grab a coke”) is an Indian herb used for healing skin and connective tissue. And yohimbe bark expands the blood vessels in the penis and increases the blood flow and nitrous oxide important for achieving an erection. A special combination of herbs has been designed specifically to heal penis fractures. It’s called the Penile Fracture & Trauma Recovery Solution. Maybe there is light at the end of this contusion!
 
What’s crazy is, literally hundreds of men a year suffer a penile fracture but do not seek immediate medical attention! Nearly all of such cases result in serious sexual dysfunctions, most commonly in the form of weak or poor erections, gross curvature, and pain. Of course, that means pain during intercourse, too. Can you imagine - you’ve waited your whole life to start getting laid regularly, and when it’s finally happening, the dumb bitch breaks your dick?! OK, that wasn’t politically correct, I meant “penis”.
 
Naturally, it is very important to seek medical treatment immediately upon suffering a fracture. And don’t let the bruises freak you out, those are battle scars of love, baby!